It's Optional

it's optional

In America, what happens if you (1) don't pay the utility bill on time? (2) The cable bill? (3) The telephone bill? (4) The local property tax?

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Yeah, you know: (1) the energy company rather immediately shuts off the stream of energy going to your house and you sit in the dark and hope you can make macaroni n cheese with matches. (2) You have to find out who was booted from America Idol last night by listening to co-workers' reactions the next day at the office water cooler (3) no more late night chatty kathy sessions with friends... but also no more calls from telemarketers (4) well, if your house burns down from your failed attempt to cook macaroni n cheese with matches, the firefighters will only arrive to make sure the fire doesn't spread to other taxpayers' houses... you're on your own.

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In the U.S., we take bills and financial obligations pretty seriously. You play; you pay. In China, it's a little different. You play; you pay... eventually... or maybe never.

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STORYtime

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Within hours of moving in to my apartment in HuaiYa way back in September, I got a message from some Chinese robot woman. A really smooth, clear, pleasant, upbeat, and excessively polite voice. Oh, so I guess they have telemarketers in China too, eh? [hang up the phone]

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She called back later that afternoon [hang up] and then again later that evening. Finally I decided to hear her out. But I couldn't understand her. I only knew that she was telling me my phone number. Okay... thanks lady, so now I know my phone number... goodbye.

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Well, she called back again and again... each day 2 or 3 times... again and again for the next 3 months. Annoying but regular, I grew accustomed to her kindly daily remindings of my telephone number. When I was bored, I would even listen to her message all the way through. In fact, she was beginning to teach me Chinese.

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Then one day in November I got a special call from this number. Having nearly hung up on her, I was shocked straight up and out of my shoes and socks to hear the rough, heavily accented, and not-so-polite (but not rude or angry) voice of a living, breathing man on the other line. He only spoke Chinese, so we fumbled around a bit. But I could gather the gist of his call very clearly: I had to pay my telephone bill. In that instant, it all clicked. I suddenly realized that that woman had been calling me every day to tell me to pay my telephone bill! And this guy suddenly realized why all those calls from the robot to my house had never been effective. Really, if that robot lady hadn't used such polite and fancy-pants language, I would have understood her a long time ago! Plain language ="PAY YOUR BILL!" I would have understood. Add some urgency and an ounce of threat to the message and I would have understood all the sooner!

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Now the careful reader will notice an odd thing. This robot had called me on my first day in HuaiYa. How did I already have an outstanding telephone bill on my first day? Well, it turns out the foreign teacher before me hadn't paid her own bill since May. So by the time I paid the telephone bill in November, the telephone company was sitting on a debt that spanned June, July, August, September, and October.

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And now the careful observer will be stunned! Yes, indeed, the telephone company does not shut off your telephone service if you don't pay your bills. Count them: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 months without paying! And telephone service is really something of a leisure compared to basic needs, don't you think? So the company should have no guilt disconnecting service until the customer coughs up the money. Nope. Not in China, er, at least not in HuaiYa.

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Just a fluke, you say? Oh no, it happened again. As you know, I paid the bill in November. Then I didn't get around to paying the telephone bill again until... oh, I don't know... last week (!)... yeah, we're sitting in April! Count 'em up: November, December, January, February, and March... another 5 months! Another 5 months with daily calls from my dear robot friend, who was ever as polite as always. So I have irrefutable proof that you can default on your telephone bill for at least 5 months without interruption in service.

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five months of consecutive non-payment, behold:

Now at this point my mother--the responsible bill payer extraordinaire--must be pitifully ashamed of me. But I have a defense. In fact, I TRIED to pay the bill on three occassions. The first two times I went to pay, the bill paying office was closed. I looked carefully at the posted hours-of-business sign: 9:00am to 5:00pm, weekdays. Well I was standing there at 3:00 on a Wednesday afternoon in December with money in hand. Why was this place closed?! I went back to ask one of the teachers and he informed me, "Oh, it's a government place. At these kind of places, often the worker arrives late, goes home early, or just doesn't show up for the day. Try again tomorrow."

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Well the time it takes to walk to this place is worth more than a year of outstanding telephone bills at the rate they charge me. So I decided to pay it when I was in the neighborhood. It just so happens that I was never in the neighborhood at the same time the place was actually open until last week. This chance event sorta felt like all 8 planets and Pluto were aligned.

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So... it's optional. You pay your telephone bill... if you want to (think about it, the previous foreign teacher effectively skipped out of town without having paid for two months of service, inadvertenly I'm sure... and at this rate I could do the same... but I won't). So, you pay your telephone bill if you want to. The government clerks show up to work... if they want to. I often get the feeling that there are so many more options here in China! :-)

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But don't get the wrong idea. Not all state employees can decide whether to work on such whims. Government-employed teachers have no such luxury, for example. And not all bills are collected so patiently. In fact, it may be that if my telephone bill had been any larger, they would have cut off service sooner. My telephone bill for FIVE MONTHS was only 20yuan...roughly 3 U.S. dollars. Even in China, that is incredibly cheap.

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And it necessary to note that the U.S. is not without it's quirks in the culture of obligations. Indeed, in these times where "bailout" is the buzz phrase, homeowners and banks get to default with minimal penalty, and crooked Ponzi schemers get to 'suffer' the punishment of house arrest in elaborate mansions financed by the very fraud for which they are being prosecuted... perhaps the U.S. is the more grotesque example of 'pay if you want'???

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Now pardon me, I'm going to go off to buy some pineapples... the fruit vendors of the streets of China are more faithful than the geysers at Yellowstone... they will be there!

March Madness

Where have I been for the last month?! No, it's not writer's block. It's called China block! For whatever reason, on March 1st I lost access to all Google-brand blogger blogs including my own. I was blocked. And my "internet behavior" was being monitored. Then today, March 24... for whatever reason... the forces that be decided I'm not a threat. So I'm back! And I pretty excited about it!!!

So I've been watched for a month, but I don't get a creepy feeling about having been spied on. Instead, I hope (if my internet behavior really was being monitored by humans) that:
-They have enjoyed my sense of humor... who else can lead them to hilarious Sarah Palin jokes, videos of puppets making prank phone calls, and video clips of Dan Quayle being an intellectual lightweight;
-They don't think I'm a lazy slob just because I have over 3,000 unopened emails in my inbox... I just have a 5 year running tradition of not opening spam... and not deleting it either!;
-They appreciate the level of random detail that I provide in my facebook status updates;
-They have acquired my fascination with 1980s nostalgia
-They didn't get irked by my internet habit of refreshing Yahoo! news to see if there is any new news
-They have updated themselves on important news items from the US, Asia, South America, Africa, and the bizarro world
-They share my interest in learning about economics, alternative energy, medical breakthroughs, chimpanzee social behavior,....
-They are excited by all the upcoming video game release dates that I have made them aware of -They have memorized the lyrics to all the 80s songs I looked up to sing along with on youtube

In the end, I think it must have been my mind-numbingly boring journeys through the streets of Belvidere, Rockford, Chicago, DeKalb, Myrtle Beach, Surfside Beach, and New York City on Google Earth-Street View that must have driven them to the brink of exhaustion of watching my internet behavior... and to the conclusion that my internet behavior is any other adjective but dangerous! :-)

And so now I and my IP address are back in the world of blogging!


UPDATE (3/25): On the very same day I regained access to my blog, thegovernmentofthecountryinwhichIcurrentlylive (tGotCiwICL) blocked Youtube. At first I thought it was just a random Youtube problem. These little Youtube accessibility hiccups happen all the time, including in the U.S. But when minutes turned into hours turned into a day, I suspected Papa Panda might be responsible. Great, I traded access to my blog for access to Youtube. And to honest, Youtube is actually more important because I use it for lessons... yeah, yeah... and as the most entertaining time suck of my life.

Anyways, I just finished reading an article on Yahoo! News that confirms that Youtube has been blocked by tGotCiwICL. Why? Apparently some video of tGotCiwICL police forces beating to death a protester from a certain hotbed province of tGotCiwICL. The English name of this particular province begins with the letter T, ends with the letter T, and rhymes with "the bet." You do know the place I'm talking about, don't you? Well anyways, tGotCiwICL says the video is faked. And in light of the shoddy reporting and yellow journalism of CNN and BBC from last year, I say there's a darn good chance it is faked. Come on, it was posted by some random guy on Youtube!!! But Papa Panda doesn't want anyone to have a look to see for himself. Which means I can't say either way. And it also means I can't get videos to make good set inductions for my classes. And it also means I can't spend my weeknights reliving the 1980s.

... for now....

Snow brings Double Happiness

SNOW DAY in HuaiYa!

These last few months have brought an intensifying drought of no snow. I listened with envy and longing to parents' and friends' tales of snow days and blizzards at home in Northern Illinois. Record snowfall there; drought here.

But forget about my sentimental attachment to snow. The drought is very real and very severe in fact. The grim truth is that it hadn't snowed, but it also hadn't rained. I think the last time I used my umbrella here in Shaanxi was probably September. In January I was beginning to wonder if something serious was going on in this region when one day 2 weeks ago I happened upon a news story informing me that in fact there was a genuine drought and that it was spread across a wide area of northern China, east and west. Some reports say the drought brings desperate conditions that haven't been seen in China since the late 1950s. Severe, eh?!

Side note. The late 1950s were Great Leap Forward times... what a double misfortune that such a disasterous policy initiative coincided with disasterous weather conditions, including drought. This 2008-2009 drought has also been a double misfortune.... regional drought and global economic crisis collide!.... unemployed migrants workers from Shenzhen returning to drought-struck land in their hometowns. It wasn't looking good...

But that began to change yesterday. Yesterday it rained. It caught almost everyone by surprise (but not me... because I watch the Weather Channel feeds like it's a hobby... ha! we Americans love our weather news!). There was a variety of responses from students. Some were annoyed because the rain caught them at a time when they didn't have appropriate clothing or an umbrella. Others were overjoyed. These were the farmers' children. They knew what came with the long-awaited rain. Cold, wet clothing? Yes, but also income, employment, and stable food prices. Everything.

And now today the precipitation came in the form of snow. And you know how I love snow. Usually in Chicagoland I would not get excited about this kind of snow. I need snow that rises above my waist to get me excited. I like snow that breaks the budget of the city snow removal department. I get a sick pleasure out of snow that terrifies me as I drive in it! But this! This is a paper-thin accumulation. And it will probably all melt within the hour. Usually I use the word "pathetic" to describe this kind of snow fall. But here and now, I am letting this snow lift my spirits quite high as it lifts Shaanxi out of drought. Plus, any amount of snow falling on Chinese rooftops is boss!

I spy only one student playing with the snow... taking time to appreciate Mother Nature's art... three other students don't know whether to work or play... so they stand around with brooms in hands (who told these kids to sweep the snow?!). And the rest of the school studies feverishly in classrooms. Snow day without the hope of 'no school.'

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hmmm, I also spy... a SNOWBALL FIGHT!!!! Now this is what you do with snow!

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And I take pictures of people's houses; I feel like a creepy Soviet spy!

UPDATE1: I just now received a text message from a student (yes, my students text me!). Here is what he wrote...

"It's snowy! The school yard is full of snow! How romantic it is!!!"

Indeed, indeed!

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UPDATE2: At 10:35, the students get a 25 minute break to rest. First they do 5 minute eye exercises and then they get the remaining 20 minutes to stretch, walk around, jog, take potty time at the W.C., etc. They are free for 20 minutes! Well what do you think they did today? Pandemonium!

All I heard was the sound of 3,000 people playing. It was a massive, complicated snowball fight. As student A throws a snowball at student B, student X tucks a snowball down the back of student A's shirt. Everywhere snowballs were flying. Snow at people. Snow at trees. Some students even threw snowballs through the windows of their classrooms... devilish! Oh, and the big story on campus was about how the students in grade1, class 4 threw a snowball at their teacher (and she liked it!)... scandalous!

Some clever students came into the teacher's compound to get their ammunition.

a little action from the Snowball Riot right beneath my window

After the break, the school leaders put a stop to it. Would the students obey? Well they had no choice; by the time of their next break 40 minutes later the snow had melted beyond grasping potential. By the afternoon it was all water.

UPDATE3: At 11:00, the Snowball Riot was instantly squelched by the sound of circus music summoning the students back to the discipline of their textbooks. Safe from the thousand crosshairs of flying snow, I left my apartment to snap some photos of HuaiYa in snow.

HuaiYa Main Street

aint it quaint?

This one makes me feel 'Christmasy'

ChiBi Must See

What is the pride of China? The Great Wall? Yeah, perhaps. Indeed there is saying that 'you haven't been to China unless you've trekked the Great Wall.' Chinese people love their Great Wall. But now there's a new contender: the 2008 Beijing Olympics. When Chinese people talk about it, their hearts bleed through their clothing. And you have to admit, the Opening Ceremony was spectacular, the Chinese athletes' performances were impressive, and China's safety and security obligations were met responsibly. China should be proud. But if I were Chinese, I would be most proud of John Woo's new epic film ChiBi. Since 1993, my favorite movie has been Jurassic Park. In 2009, now I've found a new #1. ChiBi!

History Background

Before I can talk about the movie, I must give a little history info. ChiBi is arguably the most famous and most dramatic battle in Chinese history. ChiBi was the stage-setting battle of the Three Kingdoms period.

You know, 2008 was a bad year for all of us, right? Well it was much worse in the year 208 (and the two decades preceding it). By 208, the long-reigning Han Dynasty had collapsed into the Hell of corruption, rebellion, puppet-leadership, famine, disease, and constant warfare. Instead of uniting, all the brightest minds of China had divided against and fought with each other to restore order and prosperity under their own leadership. Rebels, bandits, generals, and warlords had carved the vast empire into numerous tiny kingdoms.

An empire divided is an elimination game. Some leaders are better than others; the strong rise at the expense of the weak. In this game, one leader was particular competent. His name was Cao Cao. Cao Cao was intelligent in all things, including politics and warfare. And he was ruthless. By 208, he had eliminated most of the warlords and united northern China under his often tyranical control. By title, he had become the Prime Minister of the Han Emperor. In reality, he himself was the playmaking emperor of an incipient dynasty. With his political power and overwhelming military strength, in the year 208 Cao Cao began his campaign to wipe out the remaining warlords of the South.

In the autumn of 208, Cao Cao's campaign found successes that not only expanded his territory to the Yangzi River but also gifted him a sizeable navy. By the winter of 208, he stared down at ChiBi--the Red Cliff at the opposite side of the river. Cao Cao with his army of (supposedly) 800,000 was prepared to annihilate the two local warlords who between both of their kingdoms had 50,000. 800,000 versus 50,000! The evil Goliath versus two righteous but puny Davids! How could they possible withstand Cao Cao's onslaught? Well that is the story of ChiBi!

Movie Review

ChiBi is a war movie. So it has action. It has blood. It has death. Indeed it has all of these things on an epic scale. The cinematography here is incredible! And a brilliant soundtrack to peddle with your emotions. No wonder this is the most expensive movie ever produced in China. This is the kind of movie you must watch in the theatre before you buy the DVD.

But if ChiBi was only a war movie, there's no way I would unseat the sacred Jurassic Park to promote ChiBi as my favorite movie. ChiBi is so much more than a war movie. It is the art of war. This is about how to win a war with your mind. This is a movie about how to problem solve. And oh my are these people smart! Imagine, for example, that your army is desperately short on arrows. How would YOU solve the problem? Watch the movie to see how Zhuge Liang solves the problem, and you may revere him as much as I do!

Guess how long this movie is? Five hours. Five hours! (split into two parts; currently part 2 is playing in the theatre). In total, five hours! Not long enough!!!!!! Seriously, it's not long enough... they left some things out of the book! The history of the Battle of Red Cliffs (ChiBi) is recorded in the historical account of the Three Kingdoms. But it is also recorded in a Ming Dynasty epic novel called Romance of the Three Kingdoms. This novel is the source of all my knowledge and curiosity about the Three Kingdoms period. This novel and its stories are well known by nearly all Chinese people and in addition many people in the Koreas, Japan, Vietnam, and other parts of Southeast Asia. These stories of heroes from the Three Kingdoms period as recorded in this novel are famous in East Asian culture. Indeed I have heard that Romance of the Three Kingdoms is the second most widely read book in world history after the Bible. And the popularity of this novel are even spreading to the West as video games series based on the Three Kingdoms like Dynasty Warriors and Romance of the Three Kingdoms (a strategy game) have become popular.

What does the above tangent have to do with my review of the movie? Well, it leads to an appreciation. The movie could have dropped major subplots on account of the fact that the Chinese audience already understands the progression of events. Yet the movie doesn't drop any major subplots! All are illustrated. The story is as I remember it from the novel. And that's definitely a good thing! THANK YOU!

The movie does, however, change and add to some of the subplots. I'm okay with this. Certainly we all know that the author of Romance of the Three Kingdoms changed the history when he wrote his novel, and yet we adore his novel. ChiBi also changed some of the history and some of the events from the novel. I still adore the movie. In fact, I think in some ways the movie improves on the novel in the department of character development. In fact, character development is where the movie really shine

ZHUGE LIANG

Zhuge Liang is my hero. Zhuge Liang is my favorite character in the novel and my favorite character in this movie. And let me repeat, Zhuge Liang is my own personal hero. In the movie, he is well acted. He is brilliant. He is humble. And he is humorous. Zhuge Liang makes the movie.

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ZHOU YU

Some argue that Zhou Yu is the main character of the movie. I can see their point. He is a central person in the movie. And his place in Three Kingdom culture has shifted after this movie for this movie attempts to revolutionize the character of Zhou Yu. In the novel he is intelligent; but in the movie he is as brilliant as Zhuge Liang. In the novel, he is a petty, jealous 'friend' of Zhuge Liang; but in the movie, their friendship is genuine and deep. In the movie, he sets the standard for moral warfare. In short, Zhou Yu is a different person than the man you know from the novel. Where I despised the Zhou Yu in the novel, I respect and admire the Zhou Yu in this movie.

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CHANGBAN ZHAO ZILONG!!!!

Zilong is another one of my heroes. My Chinese name is Zilong in fact! In the novel, he is a well-rounded hero with numerous virtues. In the video game Dynasty Warriors, he is the central hero. In 2008, there was another movie produced just focusing on the story of Zilong. So Zilong is very important. But in this movie he gets very little airtime. But he still gets his famous scene of rescuing Lord Liu Bei's son and fending off Cao Cao 800,000 strong army! He also plays again in the final battle scene.

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CAO CAO

There is one word for Cao Cao in this movie. INTENSE! The actor portrays Cao Cao's brilliance, ambition, ruthlessness, and charisma as though he himself were Cao Cao. Bravo!

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SUN SHANG XIANG

This is the tomboy princess Sun Shang Xiang. In the novel, she is a rather flat character. In this movie she is very dynamic. Sun Shang Xiang is another front on which the movie has revolutionized the impression of a historical figure. In ChiBi, Sun Shang Xiang is noble, brave, clever, fiesty, and funny. You will like Sun Shang Xiang. Well-acted and an important part of the emotion of the film, she is one of my favorite characters in the movie.

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XIAO QIAO

"The most beautiful woman in all of China." Many men lust for her. Zhou Yu has won her heart, but Cao Cao plans to conquer it with his 800,000 strong army. In fact, some say she is the reason that Cao Cao launched his war. For most of the movie, her character plays the role of the stereotyped Asian beauty. But then--out of nowhere (this subplot is not even in the novel)--she has her moment of brilliance... brilliance! You will worship the tea poet Xiao Qiao too!

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SUN QUAN

He is the 'boy' ruler of the Wu Kingdom. Significant character development time is allotted to Sun Quan's maturing into a leader.

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GAN NING

Of the hundreds of heroic generals present at the battle of ChiBi, this movie focuses on General Gan Ning. His intensity and selflessness are admirable. He also has a classic funny scene. You'll know it when you see it.

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What about the other heroes, you ask?

Liu Bei: minimal airtime but a few remarks of wisdom

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Zhang Fei: featured in the beginning and end but mostly ignored except when used for comic relief

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Guan Yu: same use as Zhang Fei

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Huang Gai: his subplot is changed rather significantly in the movie

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Let me return to where I began. I think ChiBi is a proud accomplishment woth even more than the Olympics and the Great Wall. Exactly 1,800 yeas ago this winter, two kingdoms allied against a powerful foe and used their wits to accomplish something incredible in a dramatic battle of great historical significance. Within a few centuries, subsequent generations of intelligent people transformed the battle and its consequences into a myriad of exciting tales ripe for poetry, plays, and literature. In the Ming Dynasty, the particular talent of one Luo Guanzhong wrote an epic novel of highest quality; his literature still marches on its campaign to win the hearts of the known world: Chinese, other Asians, and ultimately even Westerners (I am not the only Three Kingdom fanboy... we are an army like the Star Trek nerds). Then in 2008 Chinese artists used the history and culture to make a film that displays the very best of Chinese acting, directing, script writing, choreography, cinematography, and musical score. ChiBi is the culmination of nearly 2,000 years of rich human capital.

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Okay, I have pictures of the Great Wall. I have memories of the Olympics. They're a little stale to be honest. But as I watched this movie, the excitement was so strong that I was shaking and almost going to cry! And I have been whistling the theme song of ChiBi for three days straight. I took over 100 pictures of me waving Zhuge Liang's goose-feather fan trying to capture an image of his brilliance. My mind plays with the stories of Romance of the Three Kingdoms as though they are dear friends. This is culture that captivates!

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So, when can you be captivated? This movie will come to North American theatres, I'm quite sure. I just don't know when. It will be called by it's English translation--Red Cliff (not ChiBi). It will not be 5 hours long either. It will be 2 hours or 2 and a half hours. It will have English subtitles. I don't anticipate that it will have quite the same impact on you as it did me. Afterall, my heart has been steeped in Three Kingdoms culture for four or five years. But you will enjoy the action. You will appreciate the story. You will marvel at the wisdom. You will see a very good film. That's a promise.

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Here is an unsubtitled Chinese preview to appetize your interest:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0DmuMZfZImg

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[note: if you are in China as of this date 2/6/2009, go see ChiBi NOW in the theatre. This movie was the most anticipated movie of 2008 and 2009 and a major event in the history of Chinese cinema. Watching it in the theatre is every bit as 'significant' as watching the Olympics or taking your mug shot in front of the Great Wall. Plus, it's a damn good movie! And it will have English subtitles no matter where you see it. Choose to watch the previously released and by comparison more boring ChiBi part 1 first on DVD or not, but you must see ChiBi part 2. So go see it now in the theatre... and then tell me what you think!]

Spring Festival

Spring

Festival

春节

快乐

年年

有余

祝你

发财

Happy

New Year!

I wish you

fortune

comfort

& above all joy

in 2009

Not much to report. My grade 1 students were released to go home last week. My grade 2 students have finished their exam and departed today. Now only grade 3 students--whom I don't teach--remain. So I am officially on vacation!

There's been few posts recently because 1) for a while I was very, very busy helping my students prepare for their exams 2) the Internet has been a wretch and 3) in the last few days it's been boring.

My small town is coming more and more to life as we edge closer toward Spring Festival. Explosions assualt the ears from every corner at all hours of the day. Has the Israeli military opened a front in the streets of HuaiYa? No, it's only the children playing with explosives (without the civilian casualities). Speaking of civilians... where have all these people come from? For being a physically small town, HuaiYa has always had a lot of people in the streets. But now there are more... many, many more. At least three times as many people--possibly five times as many--now crowd the streets. The commerce use to happen at the junction of the only two major roads in HuaiYa. Now the commerce stretches down the road all the way to my school.

As the new year approaches, it is the time to buy new stuff. So that's what everyone is doing! Masses of people selling things... masses of people buying things... even in my small town. New shoes, new coats, noodles, candles, lanterns, and "wish you fortune in the new year" signs all on sale in the 100 different corners of tiny HuaiYa. And the people are buying... including old ladies who shove me out of the way to get to the next stall that has the same stuff as the one they just came from. Mad consumerism... I love it! Did anyone tell these people about the global financial 'crisis'? Or maybe if we buy all new things, the soot of economic recession can't touch us in the new year?


There have also been local performances recently. One night I caught a picture of an opera being performed on the hillside overlooking the town. The stunning lighting and the cantankerous clamor of the show certainly captured my attention... heaven only knows how the students can keep studying as the happy spirit of the approaching Spring Festival penetrates their classrooms throughout the day.

What a show!

But gradually they are being released. Soon enough even the grade 3 students will be granted a short respite from their studies to enjoy the company of their friends and family and to relax. And I soon will too.

In fact, I am leaving tomorrow for my Spring Festival vacation. Now what to do about the blog? I may post updates as my way of staying in contact... and also as my way of not having to write everything that happened all at once when I return. There probably won't be pictures, just words. Or who knows, maybe there will be nothing?! Or who knows, maybe I won't even be able to depart because the traffic is so conjested and the next three weeks will be one long blog entry... right now I'm eating... right now I'm brushing my teeth... right now I'm picking my nose... lol... Who knows?! The point is, expect me to be gone a while!

Wishing everyone a happy new year.... or if you're already 1/12th finished with the new year already, then happy MLK day... happy Obama inauguration day... happy February... happy everyday. Be happy. Smile. Enjoy life.

a Christmas to Remember!

I just want to quickly update the blog to tell you all about my very special Christmas. It's no longer Christmas here, but it's still Christmas over there in the U.S. as of the writing of this blog, so perhaps this entry will add a little more joy to your holiday.

Well, just like on Thanksgiving, I was especially busy today. I had all of my four regular classes. In addition, I had to teach 4 more classes to make up for some of the classes that I missed while I was in Chengdu (I will tell you about Chengdu in future blog entries). I ended up teaching only 2 extra classes, though, because the other 2 classes were taking an exam. So in total I taught 6 classes today...

Like any teachoholic, I prefer this. I like to be in the classroom. And on Christmas Day in a foreign country, when your alternative is spending the special holiday in the company of your apartment walls, the classroom is the right place to be.

So today was a day of numerous "Merry Christmas!"s, "Happy New Year!"s, and "Happy birthday, I mean, Happy Christmas Day!"

Some of the classroom had prepared special surprises for me. One class gave me a gift... an apple with the words "Merry Christmas" and "Happy Holidays" [both written in Chinese] STAPLED into the apple in the fashion of a piece of contemporary artwork fit for the Guggenheim. One class sang jingle bells as I entered... another class sang a "happy new years" song... another class had decorated the back chalkboard with a special Christmas mural and message. There's a photo of this below. I'm standing with the artist (in bright pink) and her deskmate:


And yes, that's a Santa hat on my head... I get goofy with it sometimes...


I also began to prepare for the evening Christmas party. I and 20 selected students would wile the night away... err, I mean, linger over a 40 minute slice of their self study time... eating,talking, and laughing together.

Here's all the food we had... apples, pears, cakes, cookies, crackers, muffins, candy, bananas, peanuts, oranges, some other weird nuts/fruits, Cola, strawberry yogurt milk, walnut yogurt milk, and a GIANT cake from the school that said "Merry Christmas" and had a funny looking Santa Claus perched on top... a LOT of food!


Group photo!




One of the students wore a Santa Claus outfit... I love these kids!




Throughout the day, students and teachers gave me gifts. Here is the collection. I love these people!

The best gifts of all, however, were the letters that students wrote to me. Let me share three of them:

(I have copied them exactly as they are written)

Mr. Peterson.

Uh.... I just know I'm happy with your teaching and I hope that somedays I can help people as much as you do.

A merry Christmas to you.

Class 4

Dear Mr. Peter Son,

Happy Christmas!

I'd like to thank you for teaching all of us Grrade 1 so much English knowledge. Thank you for giving our class 1 so much special care as well.

I am a common student from a poor village in China. When I was in primary school in Grade 5, I became interested in English and foreign countries' culture. I am so interested at it that I studied English hard in order to go aboard by myself. But the resources in our village is very poor. At that time, I only learned English by reading and listening. I had never talked! So my English grow up slowly. I have thought that my dream couldn't come true.

Since I met you, things have change a lot. You helped us on many ways. I have had a lot of chances to talk, my English improved rapidly.

Though you are from America while I am from China I never regard you as a foreigner as most people do. As I see, you are my friend. You help me in English whenever I want. Thank you!

America and China became friends in 1979. They have been friends for 29 years this year. People in two countries become familier with each other. They also built good friendship with each other. I am very pround of it. I hope our friendship between two countries will be forever so both of two countries can develop in a healthy way. Also I welcome more and more people like you come to China.

In a word, I hope you will be happy all your life.

Happy Christmas!

Yours Faithfully

[name]

Dear Mr. Peters<3n.

I know that the Christmas is equal to our New Year. So you can't enjoy it with your family members or your friends is a big pity. But you're not alone, our school mates and teachers all very love you. We think you are a nice person and you're very firendly to us, you're warm-hearted as well.

Every week, after take your lessons, we often can learn a lot. And I love your games very much, you're also a good friend to us. From your game, I think you're very intelligent.

I'm also thanksful to you because of you offer help me correct my compositions. With your help, my writing skills make a great progress now. You're also very humorous often make the class active. We really like to listen to you tell stories and take lessons for us.

To be honest, I was used to be very shy when talking to foreigners. But now I have already don't afraid to speak English in public. So I'm very thankful to you.

And I think you just come to China by yourself, the spirit is deserved to admire. And if I have a chance to go to foreign countries when I grow up, I may learn you to go there by myself, I think it may be very exciting.

Merry Christmas & Happy New Year ! ! ! I hope you can enjoy this journey of came to China. And I wish you Happy F<3rever.

Best wish for y<3u.

[name]

Well, that was my Christmas, folks. Let me end by wishing joy to the world, to everyone everywhere... I have certainly had mine today... :-)

finding Christmas spirit in HuaiYa

Dec' the Walls with Rolls of TP
fa la la la la la la la la

finding CHRISTMAS in 槐芽

We really go all out for our big holidays, don't we? We don't just celebrate Independence Day with a nod and a wink to our foundations... oh no... we come together as a community to eat and enjoy expensive but impressive displays of fireworks. It's special. For Thanksgiving, we give ourselves plenty of time off to travel great distances to be together with family(s) to watch football and movies together, to do the insane Black Friday shopping together, and of course to eat the most splendid meal of the year together. It's special. And we really jump off the deep end at Halloween. Our neighborhoods and our children are transformed into the imaginative pluckings of our fantasies and nightmares. It's special. And then there is Christmas, a holiday season that is an ocean of culture wider and deeper than the Pacific.

Christmas has....

• Christmas music
• Christmas cookies
• Christmas cards
• Christmas lights
• Christmas decorations
• the Christmas tree
• Christmas gifts
• Christmas food and drinks
• Christmas dinner
• Christmas games and activities (Gingerbread house, etc.)
• Christmas movies
• the sacred and treasured Christmas snow (the only time we enjoy snow)
• the Christmas characters (Santa)
• the Christmas spirituality
• Christmas charity and volunteerism
• Christmas shopping
• Christmas greetings

So I'm in China, ya know. China has an emerging Christmas culture. Most people know about it. More and more people celebrate it (at least the Santa Claus part). How much of the above Christmas culture am I able to find here?

1. Christmas music: check. I have been listening to Christmas music via Youtube since about September. And now it's on regular rotation at that foreigner's flat.
2. Christmas cookies: no... no oven... no dough.... no knowledge of how to bake
3. Christmas cards: check... thanks to the Fam and FedEx ;-)
4. Christmas tree: check... thanks to the foreign teachers before me
5. Christmas food and drinks: no... but there is this walnut flavored milk that tastes enough like Egg Nog to give me the special feeling
6. Christmas movies: yes and no... no, I haven't found... but yes because this is China, the piracy capital of the world where even the rarest movies can be found and purchased for less than $1
7. snow: that's a no
8. Christmas characters: Santa is everywhere, but they don't know him by that name... he is called ChristmasMan in Chinese... or Old Man Christmas.
9. Christmas spirituality: no Christian church in HuaiYa, but it's okay. Mariah Carey sings O! Holy Night to remind me of the message.
10. Charity and volunteerism: No Salvation Army bells at any of the supermarkets... so this is a no
11. Christmas shopping: oh there is mad shopping of the kind you witness on Black Friday and Christmas Eve... but no one is shopping for Red-Ryder BB guns, hippopotamusses, or other random things. Just your day-to-day shopping.
12. Christmas greetings: no, not yet at least.... same old "hello? I'm fine thank you, and you?"
13. [skip 13 because it's unlucky]
14. And then, finally, there are the Christmas decorations. I have really gone to great lengths to make this happen, partly for myself and partly for the students who come to my flat each night for English Corner. Yes, there is TP... toilet paper "snow" and toilet paper snowmen. But then there are professional decorations too. Every other supermarket has a random assortment of Christmas decorations (minus Christmas lights... they never have Christmas lights... luckily Xi'an at long last delivered those). With what the other foreign teachers had left and what I have purchased since, the Christmas collection is now sufficient, I think, to say that my apartment is Dec'd for Christmas. Have a look see here:

The Christmas Tree

a TP snowman

Snowflakes hang from the ceiling to make it look like it is snowing in the living room... nice effect that the camera does not capture well

Christmas lights in the patio windows... but this particular string fizzled out after 2 days

remix: Santa Claus is coming to HuaiYa

that Christmas Glow warms the apartment

Silent Night... Holy Night... all is Calm...

So, have I found Christmas in HuaiYa?

You tell me!

A Chinese Christmas in America

I'll be home for Christmas

if only in our tree

So here we have a strange blog entry... this is not my place... not my pictures... not my story. But there's an essential connection.

Back at home in America Illinois Boone Belvidere (this is how I name places now), my family is celebrating Christmas--our most cherished holiday together--without me. But don't cry. They have found a way to invite me to the celebration at least in spirit... they have decorated the Christmas tree with all things Chinese. A wide variety of Chinese culture is on display here. The ornaments and decorations symbolize China.... but in some cases they symbolize specific culture from Shaanxi and HuaiYa where I live. Have a look look...

The Christmas tree. In a glance, it looks very beautiful... very peaceful. Just like China!

The tree top.

Now those things... those twigs with red balls... whatever they are. What about China do they symbolize? By fateful coincidence, they look EXACTLY like a local Shaanxi food that is sold by nearly every other street vendor here. It's difficult to describe these things... it is a stick with 5 or 6 pieces of some kind of carmelized grape-like fruit on it. It's sweet and crunchy. So the top of the tree looks like the HuaiYa candy-man's wagon! Haha! So funny! Shaanxi people, you know what I'm talking about!


A combinations of ornaments and lights.

A panda ornament. Did you know there are wild pandas living in the Qinling Mountains directly to the South of me? I live in the reclusive company of these treasured, endangered creatures.

A bell ornament. Bells are a significant part of the traditional Chinese culture. But there are no more bells any more, unfortunately. Now we are summoned to class by circus music.

At the top of the bell ornament there is an enraged Buddha. What is He screaming about? Perhaps he doesn't want to be part of a Christian celebration? No... the Shakyamuni Buddha was a tolerant fellow. I'm sure he's only screaming because he can't meditate properly when dad listens to the Rory Gallagher music so loudly...

A Pagoda ornament. You know, I live near some of the most important pagodas in China. Pagodas where Buddhist sutras were translated from Indian Sanskrit to Chinese... pagodas that hold bone fragments from the original Buddha himself. As pagodas serve as a symbol of Shaanxi/Xi'an's influential role in the spread of Buddhism in China, these pagodas on the tree are a perfect symbol of the Chinese culture that is relevant in my part of China!



Okay... now this one could be Japanese... but it also looks like it might be a Tang Dynasty elite woman. In fact, the style of the clothing more distinctly resembles the latter. If so... again... perfect. The part of Shaanxi where I live has the elite culture of the Tang Dynasty written all over its landscape. And some very important women in Chinese history lived and died in my neck of the woods. Of all the women in Chinese history, two of the most famous are Yang Guifei and Wu Zetian. Both beautifies with treacherous histories (Yang Guifei is one of the 4 great beauties of China and Wu Zetian is the one and only female emperor of China). Yang Guifei was murdered not to far from me and her tomb is close as well. Wu Zetian's tomb is also not too far. So this woman here on the tree is spot-on not only as a symbol of China but as a symbol of where I live. I call her Yang Guifei.

A dragon... a comical dragon. And isn't my Chinese name ziLONG?






MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! 祝你圣诞节快乐!

A Haircut in China

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more than you ever wanted to know about

A Haircut in China

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So I got a haircut last week. It could have been a really big story. Maybe they would use strange gadgets to cut the hair. Maybe they would butcher the hair. Maybe I would come out looking like a freshly-bald monk. Maybe they would slice off an ear! Maybe, at the very least, it would be uncomfortable and awkward trying to describe to the stylist how I wanted the hair to be cut.

It was none of these things. I went to the hair cutting place in HuaiYa just 1 minute from my school. Some of my students accompanied me. I told them what I wanted, and they told the hair stylist. We chatted a little in Chinese, but it was mostly silent. 10 minutes later I was a new man.

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The cut was not as short--either on top or on the back and sides--as I prefer, but I purposely kept it long for two reasons: 1) risk factor... too short and my receding hairline becomes double tarmacs that Boeing 747s could land on! and 2) long hair = extra warmth for the approaching winter. Here are the before and after photos:

BEFORE:

AFTER

I like it!

So now I'm left with nothing to say! First haircut in China... this was going to be a big ordeal... I was going to ramble on and on about it. But what more can I say about something so mundane? Well, as usual, when I have nothing to say, I can always ramble on about economics...

The Exchange Rate by the Haircut Standard

When I first decided to come to China, I had to predict my standard of living in China. What would the money I brought with be worth? And what kind of lifestyle would my monthly salary afford me? What would be my purchasing power? These are not easy calculations. My Chinese friend Bo offered a simple equation... earning 1,000 yuan in China is like earning 1,000 USD in America... spending 1,000 yuan in China is like spending 1,000 USD in America. Plugging my monthly salary into this equation, I had a rough idea of the standard of living that I would enjoy in China. But was it accurate?

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This rogue exchange rate has proved generally accurate. By Bo's model, I would be enjoying a standard of living that was more than twice that of a first year teacher. Although I am too thrifty to test the limits of my purchasing power, I do get the feeling each time I buy even the simple things that I am much richer in China than I could have ever been in America in the first 10-20 years as a teacher. My haircut will illustrate this shortly.

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Economists use more sophisticated models to conduct these calculations. The currency exchange rate is one such tool. As of this moment (11/23/2008, 7:02am), one US dollar buys 6.8 Chinese renminbi yuan. But this number alone cannot tell someone what their money will be worth in a foreign economy. Economies are too complex.

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Let's take a look at my haircut. How much does a haircut cost in America (in USD)? How much do you think this one cost (in USD)? Before subtracting the discounts that I receive from Kayleigh (wink wink), my haircuts in the US typically cost between 10-15 USD. Well this haircut cost 4 yuan. Let's consider how this haircut translates into USD by various exchange rates.

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(A) If we use the Bo Model of exchange rate where one USD has the same purchasing power in America as the purchasing power of one RMB Yuan in China, a haircut in the US that costs 15 USD should cost 15 yuan in China. Well, this one cost 4 yuan. So here is an error in the model... but in this case the error overestimated the cost, which means that it underestimated the standard of living I would enjoy with my Chinese salary... US salary to Chinese salary, it means I am roughly 4 times as "rich" as a first year teacher in the US.

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(B) If we plug the 4 yuan cost into the official exchange rate, we're looking at a 60 cent haircut. Can you imagine paying 60 cents for a haircut?!?!?! That's cheap!

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But both exchange rates fail to capture the true complexity of the difference between the Chinese and the American economies. Case in point, let's take a look at Sprite. I like to drink Sprite. In the US, a bottle of Sprite from the vending machine costs about 1 USD. In China, there are bottles of Sprite sold at similar volumes. They cost roughly 3 yuan (bargaining down from the 3.5 yuan price that the clerk may initially ask).

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(A) By the Bo Model, a roughly equivalent volume of Sprite costing 1 USD in America should cost 1 Yuan in China. Well, as you can see, it costs three times as much. My standard of living is only a little better than that of a first year teacher from this perspective.

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(B) According to the official exchange rate, the bottle of Sprite costs about 45 cents. That's pretty cheap!

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Which exchange rate is more reliable? The errors of the Bo Model are obvious. But if you average the two prices, they wash themselves out in balance. According to the Bo Model, a haircut is about 1/3 the predicted price and Sprite is about 3 times the predicted price. If I only consumed haircuts, then I would be a very very rich man! If I only consumed Sprite, then I would find living a bit more difficult. If I consume both, his 1 to 1 ratio is reliable. And indeed there are many things for which the Bo Model is directly reliable. A hearty bowl of noodles here costs about 5 yuan. Well, a hearty bowl of noodles in the US would cost about 5 USD. So, as I said, in general, the Bo Model is pretty accurate.

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What about the official exchange rate? The problem with the official exchange rate is that it makes expensive things seem cheap. It is useful for tourists who will bring their valuable USD to China and then leave. But it is altogether misleading for people living in China earning RMB. If I think of Sprite as 45 cent Sprite, I might consume a lot of it... at 3 yuan, which is a much higher fraction of my salary than the 45 cents of an American salary. I could conceivably blow my entire month's salary on Sprite.

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Thus I think it is useful to add a third exchange rate to put everything into perspective. Consider how the price of one good/service compares to the price of another good/services. In this way, you will most clearly see how different the economy of China is from the economy of America.

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One haircut costs 4 yuan; one bottle of sprite costs 3 yuan... thus a haircut costs about the same as a bottle of Sprite in China. Can you imagine a bottle of Sprite costing the same as a haircut in America! And a two-liter bottle of Sprite costs 7.5 yuan. Can you imagine a two-liter bottle of Sprite being two times as expensive as a haircut?!

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In the "after" picture of this entry, you see my brand-spankin' new sweater. This sweater cost me exactly 40 yuan. Can you imagine a sweater being 10 times as expensive as a haircut? Or a sweater being only 5 times as expensive as a two-liter bottle of Sprite (my God! that's a 6 dollar sweater!... or is it?) ????

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I argue that this third exchange rate--comparing the price of one good to the price of other goods in the same economy with the same currency--is the most reliable and necessary for survival. The supply, demand, and utility of the resources of China are just too different from the supply, demand, and utility of the resources in America. The costs of labor, training, and rent for hair stylists is different from America, so the prices will be different. This sweater from China may seems cheaper but also may fall apart after one washing. It's different. Everything is different. I need to forget about the official exchange rate. I need to forget about American prices altogether. I need to think comparatively. And I need to think with a little perspective. If 5 bottles of Sprite buys one sweater, I need to buy less Sprite and more sweaters. And I can afford to have a haircut every month if I want one!

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Learning the value of the money in your new home involves a learning curve that is a bit steeper than the grade of either the Bo Model or the official exchange rate.